Susan Dennis (susandennis) wrote,
Susan Dennis
susandennis

Guilt free piddling

One of the the gynormous benefits of retirement is the luxury of just piddling around without focus, goal or productivity guilt free. It really is a gift. And it's what I've been doing since I got back from the pool.

I was reading about Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine and the author who said she wrote the book as a way to investigate loneliness. And then I followed a couple of more links about loneliness. By all I read, my life really has a high percentage of suckage. I should be in the depths of despair with no hope for any happiness ever. And, interestingly, I did not read loneliness into the story of Eleanor Oliphant. Aloneness, yes, loneliness, no.

I treasure my freedom to do what I want to do when I want to do it without having to explain or justify or even acknowledge anyone else. My Mom used to say that I steered clear of any relationships because I didn't want to share the remote and she was not that far off. I don't want to share the remote. I have never been able to find enough value in a relationship with another person to offset the loss of that freedom.

I am alone and I have a very happy life. But, apparently, that is not normal. Fortunately, I don't give a shit.

My fitness tracker's app quit working this morning. Every time I'd open it, it would close. The tracker is tied to the app on one device at a time. I have to disconnect it - in the app - to use it on another device. So I can't just install it on a tablet and have it work when I can't get in to disconnect. Catch 22. Finally, I uninstalled it, found the APK for an earlier version and installed that. Back in biz. Whew.

The social committee for the condo has now put up Halloween decorations. I'm not sure Halloween decorations are ever not tacky but these are pretty ugly. And they made not very clever signs that you are supposed to put on your door if you want trick or treaters. So every hallway looks like trash was dumped there. Yeah it's a Get Off My Lawn time for me.

The head of the social committee is a woman with whom I disagree on nearly every single facet of living. She has a small son who is the poster boy for Annoying Children while she manages the role of empowered parent who expects you to do whatever she thinks is needed for her precious spawn. I got an email from her last night telling me that I had been selected to assist in upkeep of the Halloween decorations on my floor and keeping the soon to be added candy bowl filled. Would it be ok for her to bring by the candy for filling it on Monday night?

No. I'm not the sort who has trouble saying no. I used to work hard to make up credible white lies to ensure the person asking felt fine about the rejection. No more. No excuses. I just replied that I was opting out of the opportunity. Sweet, simple. I kept the sarcasm and snark to myself. It would have been wasted on her anyway.

This morning, once I finish piddling about, I'll be sewing up the new pants. And doing a couple of other sewing-ish things. My neoprene swimming gloves need a bit of a fix, for instance. Then the Bed Remote Fixit Guy is due. And after that, who the heck knows what excitement could ensue!
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