Better-ish, I hope

I watched the first hour of two movies and then gave up on both. I don't know whether they were bad movies or if my attention span is just shot in my old age. But, I'm sure not going to sweat it. Delete buttons are built to be used.

I did finally get in some quality day sleeping only to be woken up by a coughing fit. But, really, that one - about 5 hours ago was the last one today so far. So... good.

I took the trash down to the dumpsters and then ventured out for a walk around the block. My lungs and legs could tell that I had not been off my ass much in recent days so the walk was good. Plus I saw that they now have the permanent signs out over the new 13 Coins restaurant. Progress!

I had oatmeal and toasted English muffins for dinner and it was all delicious. The kitchen is clean and now I'm going to settle back and watch some 1 hour shows which is all the time I can devote to one plot, apparently.

Am I dying? I think this is it.

In the last year of my Mom's life, she fell a few times and the last time, as she was being wheeled into the hospital, she said to Molly, the wonderful woman who took care of her, "Am I dying? Is this it? I think this is it."

And it was. 5 days later. She was 82 and tired. She'd have been fine with going on but she was equally ok with its being the end. I do think it was interesting that she knew.

I wonder if I'll know. I wonder that a lot. The older I get the more I wonder. I do not stress about dying alone and not being found for days. I'll be dead. I won't give a shit whether or not I'm found. I'd rather not drop and be in pain for days but dying, I'm ok with.

Will one of these coughing fits just end in not being able to breathe at all? I wondered that last night, when in the middle of the night, I spent a good 5 minutes really struggling. But, I pulled out of it and that turned out to be the only part of the night that was a problem at all. I slept well.

I got up rough. Massive coughing. I seriously thought about not swimming but I rallied and thought that maybe my lungs might appreciate it. I think they did. It was not the greatest swim ever but I managed 1,900 yards and most of it was fine. And being in the water is always good.

I stopped and got some breakfast and then stopped for a few things at Trader Joe's and then came home and tried to sleep. But wound up coughing instead. So now I'm sitting on the bed in the dark, internetting. I think I'm just going to watch TV and knit and maybe do nothing else today.

More complaining...

I took the antibiotic a good 5 hours ago and so far I feel worse than I have since this thing first attacked. Probably not a cause and effect but still. I'm so tired of this cough.

On the bright side, the antibiotic - not covered by insurance - was $3.29. I was astounded. My inhalers (one of which is basically generic) are like $200 a pop. The disparity is wild. This country's medical cost situation is just out of control.

And speaking of insurance...

And I just got another phone call from Humana. There are 3 pages of communications preferences on their website. My selection is DO NOT communicate with me but if you feel like you must, then email only. Last September I bitched on Twitter and was, supposedly, put on their do not call list. I just bitched again and was, again promised this elusive and clearly ineffective do not call list. Those people really like to fuck with me.

It is truly a night for easy comfort food dinner... sausages and mac n cheese.

I'm declaring today the worst and tomorrow starts the better.

I give up

Yesterday's reprieve seems to have been temporary. I'm back to full coughing today. My abs are getting quite the workout. I'm going to have a solid six pack soon. The first half of my swim today was miserable. Coughing while swimming is a petty dicey affair. By the second half, however, things got much much better and I ended up enjoying it and glad I went.

Fridays, by the way, are in competition with Mondays for big crowds at the pool. Because the pool is so big - six lanes with one of them a double - it's really never too crowded. And the population remains way older (and almost exclusively white - not even any Asians - it's kind of creepy that it's so white) than LA Fitness. And the individual swimmers swim longer sessions. It's such an interesting difference.

Anyway, I'm going to get that stupid antibiotic prescription filled today. If it cures me I'm going to be pissed that I waited so long to take it. If it doesn't I'm going to be pissed that I got sucked into the antibiotic game. Nice way to set myself up.

The Capital One accounts website it down. It gives me a visual of gray corporate offices filled with white men in gray suits with heads rolling up and down between the cubicles. For sure at least one part of that organization is having a no good very bad morning.

So as soon as the gotowork traffic simmers down, I'm off to the drug store. And then maybe I'll pop into the grocery store. I could stand to put some gas in the car.

And then I want to get started on that pattern I started yesterday. And I'd very much like to quit coughing.

There's a chance that I might live

I didn't do much this morning and kind of eased into the afternoon doing a little of this and a little of that and then I printed out a pattern I wanted to make and really got into tweaking it. Making a different neck, different sleeves, deeper pockets and building all that into the actual pattern.

I really got into it and it was fun and creative plus I think it's going to be a very cool outfit. I worked on it a good while and then realized I'd been on my feet and moving around and NOT coughing!! As I finished up, the building manger called me downstairs to help him with something and we had a long conversation and I did NOT cough!!

Just now I coughed once. Not a 5 minute spasm of ohmygodicannotbreathe coughing I've been doing lately. Just one single, isolated, not even horrible sounding cough. So maybe this is not fatal.

I did get a beautiful 2018 calendar from New Zealand today. My friend, Scott, sends me one every year and I love it. This year's is very different, tho. It is without the 487 holidays that the Kiwi's observe. Really, it's amazing how many holidays they have. But not on this new calendar and a lot of the pictures are those of Getty Images who's HQ I can see out my living room window. Fun.

Time to think about dinner because I am really starving.

Cough cough

I am getting really weary of this cough. Really. When I'm not coughing, everything is petty good but then I get attacked. It sounds so gross and it's getting in the way of my life. I had to stop swimming twice this morning to cough and then catch my breath. Unacceptable.

I got home and had some toast and coffee and internet and then went back to bed and slept for an hour an a half. At least I can do that without interrupting anything. I'm now vigorously debating with myself whether or not to start those antibiotics. I think I'll put the decision off until tomorrow.

On the bright side, I'm wearing my new patchwork pants today and they are making me smile. So far they are also very comfortable. The seams aren't bothering me at all.

I just read about a new restaurant up the street. I want to give it a try but not today. The air quality is still cruddy and it would be a little stupid to go prancing out in it just because. Maybe tomorrow.

I don't have any place I have to or need to go today and no one needs to hear this hack so I'm going to stay right here.

mad patchwork attack!

So today I made these pants and I love them so much.

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I had the idea back when I saw a woman in an video on LJ in patchwork pants. But my initial forays proved my technique for joining the squares was too tedious. I needed a better plan. So I put the squares away. Then, the other day I got them out and started playing with them on the serger. BINGO! Now I can easily make all the patchwork fabric I want. I'm thinking a jacket to match the pants. And/or t-shirt, hoodie... don't even think of trying to stop me.

Then I got a notice that I had a package downstairs. I was expecting nothing. No outstanding order was slated for delivery today... So I went down to get the mystery box. My friend, Tija, was down there and she said it looked like an umbrella 'but you live in Seattle, you don't need no stinkin' umbrella!*' It was too heavy for an umbrella anyway.

I got it upstairs and opened it up to find a card. Merry Christmas from my Mariners Diamond Club guy... A regulation Louisville Slugger! With my name on it. And a very classy lucite mounting thingie.

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I have several good ideas about where it will be mounted. And I have a brother coming who can handle said mounting. So cool.

*'They' say that real Seattle-ittes don't 'do' umbrellas. And, in truth, I have about 5 and never ever use any of them. Who has enough hands for that silliness.

Ahhhh Tavis Smiley just got suspended for sexual harassment. He's the one I've been waiting for. I have always thought he was probably a snake IRL.

I also got more database work done but I am now terrorizing myownself. I used to work for a guy who was great. Smart, funny, sharp... but, when he was also a project lead, I always wanted to rip his teeth out. He'd design a website and then turn it over to us to build and then a week later, when we were 75% done, he'd change the rules that affected all the pages/queries/coding we'd already finished. Over and over and over again.

I'm doing the same thing to the data bases. I keep adding shit and then having to go back and retrofit the entries I have already done. I'm not going to rip my teeth out, tho.

And just now I remembered something else I dreamed up while swimming this morning. I want to make a little wallet out of clear plastic that I can use to carry around snippets of the fabric in my stash. I'll slip it into my purse. Then if I find myself in a fabric selection situation, I'll have all the info I need. Maybe I'll remember to make that wallet tomorrow. I also need to remember where I put that plastic I saved from the sheets I bought recently.

Still coughing. The only time I've talked to anyone today, it triggered a coughing fit. Good thing I don't spend my days chatting people up. Also I keep forgetting to do my albuterol inhaler. I need to set an alarm on my phone maybe.

I just put a potato into the oven for baking. Yum. Plus warm oven! It's kind of chilly in here tonight.